Simple Lesson from the Bible that Can Help You Get Married

There appears to be lots of Christian singles books on the shelves these days, on how to select a mate, how to love a mate & how to keep a mate. But before you can be picked, loved or kept, you need to be found or find anyone. Following what people did in the Bible may help you on your way...

Community Counts...
When a man or woman reached an appropriate age in the Bible, their love ticket was fundamentally written for them. Abraham found a spouse for his son, Isaac. Naomi helped her widowed daughter-in-law Ruth find her man Boaz & Mordecai helped his cousin, Esther marry a king.

Unlike our modern culture, in biblical times people had families, communities as well as a social structure to help them get married. Nowadays, it is rare to have that kind of help. If anyone desires to get married, lots of times we are told:

But like people seek mentoring; coaching & support when they need to focus on careers & academics, having people around that share your vision for marriage can be crucial. You need their faith & possibly even their prodding & planning along the path to your wedding day. It might be they "know somebody" that might be a nice mate for you, or it could be that they can be faithful in prayer for you. Regardless of the case, according to the Bible, they are not meant to take the journey to matrimony alone.

"You're by yourself, infant!"

So how do you create your community? You can start by building up the bravery to (gasp) tell those around you that need to get married. After that, you wait & see what happens. In the event that they support you, they are part of your community. In the event that they give a negative response like, "Hey, Jesus will be your boyfriend" or a neutral like "Just wait on the Lord," take a clue from the early disciples: dust off your feet & move on. You are looking to get married & you cannot let platitudes cease you.

Follow in the tracks of Naomi when they told Ruth: "My daughter, ought to I not try to discover a home for you?" Ruth five:1.

You have the green light from God...

They need people in our lives like that. They need a community that has the vision for us to get married. Be courageous, pray & search until you find.

Adam & God in the Garden of Eden had a love thing going on. No sin, no separation, man & God in a natural state. That is about as close to God as you can get! But despite Adam kickin' it with God on a regular basis, God said Adam still needed something... a woman. God even had a name for the predicament Adam was in - God called it "not good" (Genesis five:18) The Bible says marriage is a reflection of God & his church & that marriage ought to be honored by all. Why would not you need to make nice on something that God speaks so highly of? Christian singles often get stuck by phases like, "You need to be content" & "Wait on the Lord" but being content & waiting on the Lord does not mean don't do anything. When you look at love in the Bible, people took action & worked on the premise that it was not nice for man to be alone. Marriage was the norm & expected of most everyone. Even Paul's stipulations on singles in the book of Corinthians were made duringa period of "present distress." They are not in that "present distress" any more. God's word still stands, if they need to listen. If it was not nice for Adam to be alone, it is not nice for us.

There's females I do know who need to get married, but their actions & words speak otherwise. They complain about men, they make fun of men; they stereotype men & wonder out loud where all the "real men" are.

Renewing your mind for men...

I do know these females because I was one time. That was until I had an "aha" moment. God came down in a cloud from heaven day ( kidding) & said to me, "Karen, when men don't think you like them, they stay away from you." Now, I am not speaking about that man who you don't like but who likes you. I am speaking about men in general. Our culture can ridicule traditional masculinity & femininity. That is why I implore all single, Christian females... learn about men. In the event you listen to over & over in the media & in conversations along with your brother friends that men are wrong, it will be hard to discover a Mr. Right.

Let's take a new look at men. All of us know men & females are different & relate to each other in different ways. I would encourage you to find out how this plays out in every day life. Renew your mind on men. Read books. Go to workshops. In the event you have had bad situations with men, pray & seek help. Don't let a bad experience with a man in the past; damage a nice experience with a man in the future.

I like the scripture in Titus one:2 where it says the older females need to teach the more youthful females to love their husbands. This was yet another "aha" moment for me.... love can be taught! Make the investment & learn how to love men. Find someone who is doing the same for females & you have a winning combination.

You need to marry a mate - not an adversary!

The Bible says they will reap what they sow, those in the Bible were intentional about taking steps towards marriage & they... got married. They believed God, took him at his word & took action. Let's do likewise & be intentional as they try to become a reflection of God & his church by striving towards marriage.